she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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