There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
