Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
