The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
