I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
