woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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