im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
