I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
