i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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