What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
