I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
