i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
