I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
