Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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