i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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