Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Randomize
