and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
