I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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