mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
