My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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