Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
you traded sex for a burrito?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
