Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
