It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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