I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
