I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
