matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Dicks are not precious.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize