when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
