Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
