I feel great
I just peed on a car
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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