Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
