My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
