Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
