We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize