He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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