His apartment number was 69. I had to.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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