Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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