I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Randomize
