is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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