I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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