Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
