Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
