Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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