Well apparently he's into motor boating.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
