Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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