My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
