We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
