Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
