no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
