Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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