Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Someone shit on the floor
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Randomize